Let’s Make a Deal

When I have time to write, I find that I am often writing about food. I love to eat and I especially love when the food is so tasty in the absolute sense that I am already mentally writing my blog before I even leave the restaurant. Last week I met with friends every night of the week, which meant a lot of eating out. Some of the places are old standbys for me now–like Tryst or Busboys and Poets. Some places I don’t make it to very often, but they still serve a solid meal, like Pizza Paradiso.

Cashion's Eat Place (photo courtesy of We Love DC)

Others simply blow me away and I was lucky enough to have one of those meals this weekend. I had been greedily holding a Scoutmob coupon hostage for nearly a week–50% off to Cashion’s Eat Place, a neighborhood restaurant that is always packed. I had walked past Cashion’s a hundred times in the two years I’ve lived in Adams Morgan and never made a reservation. It is a casual-upscale location with a glowing pink and neon sign and an outdoor patio.

Sunlight and brunch? Sold.

As we hastily elbowed our way past the mob waiting for the restaurant to open for brunch at 11:30AM (what restaurant can afford to open so late for brunch–friggin’ Cashion’s, that’s who) and I lustily stared down the plates as they walked past us to other tables. I broke my vegetarian fast and opted for the traditional bacon and eggs because I knew this place was going to be special. David downs a mimosa (lovely–perhaps fresh squeezed?), I had a cup of coffee (super weak, the low point of the meal) and we delicately applied real butter to our freshly baked rolls (I believe Jesus made these loaves–they were divine). David’s bison burger came out perfectly pink and the comeback sauce (ketchup, mustard, mayonnaise and cornichons) did its job–we will be coming back.

Satiated, soothed, perhaps even lulled–we tasted a light banana bread before waving a white flag at our waiter.

The Bison Burger at Cashion's Eat Place (photo courtesy of David-I-like-bison-Allen

While we waited for the check to arrive, David asked me not to use the Scoutmob coupon. Not understanding, I demanded to know why we wouldn’t want 50% off to a place with incredible food and he answered, “Because, it was worth the full price.”

This is true–I would gladly pay for the full price of the meal, but that would be next time, when we came back.

No, David said, they worked hard to prepare this food and we enjoyed it–they deserve every penny.

Being a marketer, I argued that it was Cashion’s who made the deal with Scoutmob–they knew what they were getting into, it is a promotional cost they would have paid in some other way, through direct advertising or newspaper ads, etc. Further, Cashion’s deserved to know what finally brought me in their door–the 50% off deal from Scoutmob–as well as some great reviews from friends. And Scoutmob, who had done the research and facetime with the restaurants to bring me the deal deserved to know their work had been successful.

But David was adamant–he reminded me of the tired look of the waitstaff when we handed them a Groupon deal, sure that we were going to stiff them on their tip. The “deal” model is not one that takes the middleman into account.

I knew I had lost the battle and so we left the restaurant, having paid the full price and leaving a generous tip.

I think David has a point, but I’m curious friends–what do you think? If we enjoyed the meal as much as we did, should we have ignored the coupon or did we miss out on an important step in the business life cycle by failing to disclose what brought us to the table?

Either way, you now have a restaurant you can and should add to your “musts” list.

Best damn bacon, ever.

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A Place at the Table

This Thanksgiving I want to make something that is equal to the amount of work the rest of my family members put into holiday food preparation. As I mentioned last year, being a vegetarian is complicated around the holidays. Not only do you have to often (and gently) remind folks that no, you’re not going hungry, and yes, you are more than happy for them to eat the turkey and stuffing, you also have to think ahead to how you can contribute to the meal.

For this vegetarian, no amount of fake meat products can replace the comforting taste of the real thing, so perhaps Thanksgiving is about trying something different altogether instead of trying to replicate a traditional meal.

Photo of Sweet Potato Tort by Vegetarian Times

Last year I made a delicious and tangy curried cranberry sauce and this year I’m thinking of tackling something a little heartier. Vegetarian Times had a great November issue featuring this amazing Sweet Potato Torte, the New York Times dedicated an entire 2010 article and photo spread to a vegetarian Thanksgiving, and I’m a big fan of the Time‘s Pinenut and Squash Pizza as an alternative main course.

Since my mom owns the desserts and my grandma keeps watch over the traditional American sides, why not contribute to the amuse bouche around lunch time? These sweet potato balls look divine and I admit that I keep coming back to the red variation that cranberries give to the table with something like this cranberry truffle recipe from Mark Bittman.

I’m curious friends–before the turkey makes it to the table and you survey the meal landscape, what are your favorite non-meat dishes on the table? Maybe this year I can bring one of your family traditions to our table.

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Tunes

David Allen is in charge of the music. And you should be glad about this. His musicality is diverse and eclectic while mine primarily hovers somewhere between a 50-year old theater professor and a thirteen year old pop goddess.

His search for the perfect reception DJ is on (once I bug him about it one more time…) and while he’s covering the dance party, my goal is to set the mood in the very public Meridian Hill park.

A fun choice would be an invitation for Urban Art to play at our wedding. I’ve seen them a few times at metro stops and along the streets of DC. Unfortunately, they also come with a $1,000 per hour price tag.

But my truly dreamy option would be a small jazz trio who could envelope me in the comforting sounds of Kanye and Coldplay as I walked down the aisle. In the meantime, Vitamin String Quartet’s Modern and Gay Wedding collections will just have to keep me inspired.

Here are a few of my instrumental cover picks:

Or, can a whole chorus of kids just break out into Viva la Vida?

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Historic Wedding Traditions

My guess is that the majority of today’s brides and grooms have no appreciation for the historic context of their own wedding traditions. Why do women wear a veil? What’s the purpose of the garter? Who decided newly wed couples should travel after their ceremony?

I’ve done a little research on the unsettling origins of these most beloved traditions. Some I believe to be true, like each of the histories outlined below, and others I find too bizarre to be accurate (like, the notion that a “wedding band” arises from the term “wedding bound” when men used to bind women’s hands and arms together as a way to keep their spirit from leaving their body and thus extending their life together.)

As for me, I’ll be walking myself most of the way down the aisle before I meet my dad and my mom for the last bit of that journey. David and I’ll be exchanging rings, but we will be forgoing the garter or bouquet toss. We’re taking a honeymoon, but I’ll be going willingly. And that veil? It certainly won’t be covering my face.

The Veil

Some sources date the practice of the bride wearing a wedding veil back to the Romans or the Crusders. Originally intended to be a form of physical protection, the veil kept the bride safe from impurities, included the dreaded “evil eye” of sin. In other cultures where arranged marriages were practiced, the veil served to reveal the bride’s features, for the first time, to her now husband upon completion of the vows.

The Garter

The garter has one of the least known, but most troubling histories and one that is more difficult to confirm. In history, the wedding party would often be allowed to witness the couple as they consummated their marriage by following the couple to their room. It was then considered good luck for the wedding party to have a piece of the bride’s clothes (presumably as they came off). Legend has it that the garter was created so that the happy couple could easily toss a piece of their clothing to the grabby party as a symbol of their intended consummation and then be left in privacy.

Under the Threshold

Women were often carried “under the threshold” against their will by husbands their fathers had chosen for them. I think today they call that…rape. The best man has a similar history–they were intended to help strong arm the bride should she try to run away.

The Honeymoon

Like the garter, the honeymoon has several historic variations. It is said both literally and figuratively that the couple would drink honey-mead for full cycle of the moon (a reference to the first month of marriage being the sweetest). Many stories involve the fertility cycle of the newly married couple and maximizing on the bride’s ability to become pregnant during this time. Still, a harsher story is that a man who had kidnapped a woman would be protected by his wedding party at a hideout until the bride’s family assumed that she was never to be found again and he could have her without a dowry to her father.

This information was gathered from a variety of semi-trustworthy sources around the internet.

The couple the Segways together stays together?

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Happy Labor Day

Good Reads

Extending the range of a food lover and a marriage from the Washington Post

Write a letter to your future at Futureme.org via Washington Post

Just My Type via NPR

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27 years

Sometime around the age of ten or eleven, I started to think about how my dad’s eyesight must affect his memory of the things he will not see clearly again. While we assume that we will just look more closely at that item or event the next time we see it, did he grasp at his history, trying to recreate ordinary events and objects knowing he would only see them less vividly the next time? Did he give formerly dulled images a brighter glow than their reality? After all, how accurately can you remember the fluent colors of a neon sign or the bright contrast of a shiny penny on a sidewalk? And could you describe them to yourself in way that made them brilliant and complete and real?

Mostly, I couldn’t imagine trying to recreate the powerful vision of a sunrise in my mind–what had it looked like the last time I had fully seen the developing colors of its revelation? What if the last spectacular sunrise you saw was the one you would have to remember always–the one that would have to keep your memory of that event wholly alive for you for the rest of your life?

This meditation, resting somewhere between loss and gratitude, gave me perspective, and it was sometime around then that on my birthday, each year, I began to find a place of solitude around sunrise or sunset. I wanted to reflect on the changes that had occurred in the past year and the challenges that I had selected for myself in the coming year. I wanted to put out into the universe my most authentic response for bringing me all of the good things in my life. And most importantly, I wanted to find a purposeful quiet so that I might appreciate the sight in its absoluteness.

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Where have all the cowgirls gone?

Have you met me? I’m a pretty staunch feminist. And get this–I shave my legs and wear a bra, for real.

The women of Mad Men courtesy of TheGloss.com

David understands this about me, and I feel like we’ve been able to educate each other pretty regularly about gender issues. When we first began watching Mad Men, I literally had to stop the Netflix DVD because I felt so angry and abused by the treatment of the women on screen. I’ve heard this is a testament to the true likeness of gender inequality during this era (and many before it), but it doesn’t make it any easier to watch.

Recently, when David’s parent’s came to visit, we got into an argument about cleaning. It’s family, after all, and why would a few out of place things matter? But the truth of the matter is, no one will ever look at David and wonder why he doesn’t keep a clean house. That judgement will rest squarely on my shoulders. Not only did he feel bad, but the societal pressures of the housemaker as female was a factor he had never considered. For what it’s worth, David does every damn piece of house cleaning that I do, and we switch between listening to my girl rock and his hip-hop-a-thon, before settling down with the likes of Mumford & Sons while we’re cleaning.

So, it shouldn’t be surprising that Katy Perry (and Lady Gaga and Britney Spears and…) and her role as a (anti-) feminist has come up in conversation a number of times, as her bust-bearing photos scroll through my Last FM playlist.

Cupcake bra photo courtesy of MTV

“I like Katy Perry. I think she takes back the power of sex. She doesn’t rely on a man to tell her she can be sexy–she meets him there.”

“I’ll agree, she’s different, more fun than others. She says, meet me at the party, not, ‘I’m a slave for you.’”

Sometimes she simply seems like a “perry-ody” of herself, of women who are oversexualized.

Of course, there are others who disagree with this idea, and rightfully so. Katy P’s music seems to disenfranchise her ability to be confident and complete all on her own. The rape scenario in “E.T.” with Kayne West, her “experimentation” with kissing a girl, and “sun-kissed skin so hot/we’ll melt your Popsicle,” well, they don’t do much to help her cause. But in real life, Katy Perry grew up pretty conservatively, has shied away from drinking and drugs, married the “reformed” Russell Brand and doesn’t seem to lead a massively messed up or publicized existence. Not bad considering the path of her peers (Rhianna, Lindsey, Gaga, Britney, Keri Hilson, Ke$ha). I like Katy Perry’s catchy music and I think the next step in her career will be to individualize herself as a powerful female icon.

As we wait for that transition, David’s little sister moves beyond Disney pop-princesses now, and we can’t help but wonder how what she hears on her ipod will influence her self-image.

So what does feminist music look like today?

Get it, Pink. But let’s watch the stuff about “underdogs” being “little freaks.”

And just because it’s an incredible performance.

Sad, this song had so much potential to be a feminist anthem and a great video. Instead it becomes about criminalizing the “other woman.”

Love “Knock-You Down” as well, but man, I resent the implication that she’s the object here that thinks about “a life, a house, and kids” when she falls in love. Check out Ne-yo’s respectful second versus compared to Kanye’s angry third verse (“Now, I’m mad, real mad, Joe Jackson. You should leave your boyfriend now.”)

And perhaps most frustrating:

Ne-yo get’s the lyrics right, but then the video! Over the head breast shots, break away images of headless body parts, hyper-sexualized staff who await his ogling glances. Sigh. Note: Ne-yo’s official website is www.neyothegentleman.com

Other Good Beats

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